Question 1

love and lost meaning 在Facebook 的評價

Accepted Answer

My Newest Project: Panas MealMany of you who followed me might be familiar with a quote I strongly follow:Keep the FIRE Burning 🔥The meaning behind it?Passion through Challenging times❤️‍🔥This BELIEF has help me through a lot in my life - through many personal struggle, break ups, gym moments, conflict, self doubt, self sabotaging, communication issue…etcEvery time I go through a challenge, I’d repeat this quote like a mantra to fire myself upBecause to me: it signifies the inner Strength I know I have, the FIRE within that ALL of us have to keep burning no matter what the External world throwsBurn through the Challenges, Baby 🔥-And so in 2020, when Covid hit the WorldI experienced a close friend’s Mother, who almost lost her battle with Covid 🦠 Because of her Health, she had already suffered from Type 2 Diabetes, and when covid hit her, it was a do or die situation. I saw how much damage this did to my friend and his familyThey were very lucky, because they had first aid supportBut in reality, there were many others who didn’t have this luckAnd to be Honest with you, I felt extremely powerless at that time - and it sparked something in me. I knew I had to do something different, but I have no idea what I was gonna do until I got my hands dirty, and I didAnd that’s how Panas Meal is born 🔥@PanasMeal was born, as cliche as it sounds, out of PassionThe mission to SUPPORT people’s Love for Food in Malaysia in a Unique wayWhy Food?Because Malaysia 🇲🇾 is filled with “Happy Food”Food that we all enjoy, but at the cost of our healthI want @PanasMeal to be a place where you can enjoy FOOD without the expense of losing your health, in-fact, better itI know I’ve shared so many things in this single post, but truly, I am just a man who strive to do better each and everyday, and I hope you can give my newest venture @panasmeal a followYour support means the world to me, and what we’re about to do. And with my mighty biceps, I will bless you, that you won’t be disappointed on the food that I’m about to introduce🔥@PanasMeal Launching in 3 Days#ProjectX

Question 2

love and lost meaning江魔的魔界（Kong Keen Yung 江健勇） 在Facebook 的評價

Accepted Answer

這是前些日子爆出已經被加拿大法院接理對藏傳佛教噶舉派法王的訟訴。（加拿大法院鏈接在此：https://www.bccourts.ca/jdb-txt/sc/21/09/2021BCSC0939cor1.htm?fbclid=IwAR2FLZlzmUIGTBaTuKPVchEqqngcE3Qy6G_C0TWNWVKa2ksbIYkVJVMQ8f8）

這位法王的桃色事件，我是幾年前才聽到。但，藏傳佛教的高層有這些性醜聞，我已經聽了幾十年。我以前的一位前女友也被一些堪布藉故上她的家摟抱過，也有一些活佛跟她表白。（這不只是她，其他地方我也聽過不少）

這是一個藏傳佛教裡面系統式的問題。

很多時候發生這種事情，信徒和教主往往都是說女方得不到寵而報仇，或者說她們也精神病，或者說她們撒謊。

我不排除有這種可能性，但，多過一位，甚至多位出來指證的時候，我是傾向於相信『沒有那麼巧這麼多有精神病的女人要撒謊來報仇』。

大寶法王的桃色事件，最先吹哨的是一位台灣的在家信徒，第二位是香港的女出家人，現在加拿大又多一位公開舉報上法庭。

對大寶法王信徒來說，這一次的比較麻煩，因為是有孩子的。（關於有孩子的，我早在法王的桃色事件曝光時，就有聽聞）

如果法庭勒令要驗證DNA，這對法王和他的信徒來說，會很尷尬和矛盾，因為做或不做，都死。

你若問我，我覺得『人數是有力量的』，同時我也覺得之後有更多的人站出來，是不出奇的。

我也藉此呼籲各方佛教徒，如果你們真的愛佛教，先別說批判，但如鴕鳥般不討論這些爭議，你是間接害了佛教。

（下面是我從加拿大法院鏈接拷貝下來的內容，當中有很多細節。）

Table of Contents

INTRODUCTION

BACKGROUND

ANALYSIS

A. The Spousal Support Claim in this Case

B. The Test to Amend Pleadings

C. Pleadings in Family Law Cases

D. The Legal Concept of a Marriage-Like Relationship

E. Is There a Reasonable Claim of a Marriage-Like Relationship?

F. Delay / Prejudice

CONCLUSION

INTRODUCTION
[1] The claimant applies to amend her notice of family claim to seek spousal support. At issue is whether the claimant’s allegations give rise to a reasonable claim she lived with the respondent in a marriage-like relationship, so as to give rise to a potential entitlement to spousal support under the Family Law Act, S.B.C. 2011, c. 25 (“FLA”).

[2] The facts alleged by the claimant do not fit within a traditional concept of marriage. The claimant does not allege that she and the respondent ever lived together. Indeed, she has only met the respondent in person four times: twice very briefly in a public setting; a third time in private, when she alleges the respondent sexually assaulted her; and a fourth and final occasion, when she informed the respondent she was pregnant with his child.

[3] The claimant’s case is that what began as a non-consensual sexual encounter evolved into a loving and affectionate relationship. That relationship occurred almost entirely over private text messages. The parties rarely spoke on the telephone, and never saw one another during the relationship, even over video. The claimant says they could not be together because the respondent is forbidden by his station and religious beliefs from intimate relationships or marriage. Nonetheless, she alleges, they formed a marriage-like relationship that lasted from January 2018 to January 2019.

[4] The respondent denies any romantic relationship with the claimant. While he acknowledges providing emotional and financial support to the claimant, he says it was for the benefit of the child the claimant told him was his daughter.

[5] The claimant’s proposed amendment raises a novel question: can a secret relationship that began on-line and never moved into the physical world be like a marriage? In my view, that question should be answered by a trial judge after hearing all of the evidence. The alleged facts give rise to a reasonable claim the claimant lived with the respondent in a marriage-like relationship. Accordingly, I grant the claimant leave to amend her notice of family claim.

BACKGROUND
[6] It should be emphasized that this is an application to amend pleadings only. The allegations by the claimant are presumed to be true for the purposes of this application. Those allegations have not been tested in a court of law.

[7] The respondent, Ogyen Trinley Dorje, is a high lama of the Karma Kagyu School of Tibetan Buddhism. He has been recognized and enthroned as His Holiness, the 17th Gyalwang Karmapa. Without meaning any disrespect, I will refer to him as Mr. Dorje in these reasons for judgment.

[8] Mr. Dorje leads a monastic and nomadic lifestyle. His true home is Tibet, but he currently resides in India. He receives followers from around the world at the Gyuto Monetary in India. He also travels the world teaching Tibetan Buddhist Dharma and hosting pujas, ceremonies at which Buddhists express their gratitude and devotion to the Buddha.

[9] The claimant, Vikki Hui Xin Han, is a former nun of Tibetan Buddhism. Ms. Han first encountered Mr. Dorje briefly at a large puja in 2014. The experience of the puja convinced Ms. Han she wanted to become a Buddhist nun. She met briefly with Mr. Dorje, in accordance with Kagyu traditions, to obtain his approval to become a nun.

[10] In October 2016, Ms. Han began a three-year, three-month meditation retreat at a monastery in New York State. Her objective was to learn the practices and teachings of the Kagyu Lineage. Mr. Dorje was present at the retreat twice during the time Ms. Han was at the monastery.

[11] Ms. Han alleges that on October 14, 2017, Mr. Dorje sexually assaulted her in her room at the monastery. She alleges that she became pregnant from the assault.

[12] After she learned that she was pregnant, Ms. Han requested a private audience with Mr. Dorje. In November 2017, in the presence of his bodyguards, Ms. Han informed Mr. Dorje she was pregnant with his child. Mr. Dorje initially denied responsibility; however, he provided Ms. Han with his email address and a cellphone number, and, according to Ms. Han, said he would “prepare some money” for her.

[13] Ms. Han abandoned her plan to become a nun, left the retreat and returned to Canada. She never saw Mr. Dorje again.

[14] After Ms. Han returned to Canada, she and Mr. Dorje began a regular communication over an instant messaging app called Line. They also exchanged emails and occasionally spoke on the telephone.

[15] The parties appear to have expressed care and affection for one another in these communications. I say “appear to” because it is difficult to fully understand the meaning and intentions of another person from brief text messages, especially those originally written in a different language. The parties wrote in a private shorthand, sharing jokes, emojis, cartoon portraits and “hugs” or “kisses”. Ms. Han was the more expressive of the two, writing more frequently and in longer messages. Mr. Dorje generally participated in response to questions or prompting from Ms. Han, sometimes in single word messages.

[16] Ms. Han deposes that she believed Mr. Dorje was in love with her and that, by January 2018, she and Mr. Dorje were living in a “conjugal relationship”.

[17] During their communications, Ms. Han expressed concern that her child would be “illegitimate”. She appears to have asked Mr. Dorje to marry her, and he appears to have responded that he was “not ready”.

[18] Throughout 2018, Mr. Dorje transferred funds in various denominations to Ms. Han through various third parties. Ms. Han deposes that these funds were:

a) $50,000 CDN to deliver the child and for postpartum care she was to receive at a facility in Seattle;

b) $300,000 CDN for the first year of the child’s life;

c) $20,000 USD for a wedding ring, because Ms. Han wrote “Even if we cannot get married, you must buy me a wedding ring”;

d) $400,000 USD to purchase a home for the mother and child.

[19] On June 19, 2018, Ms. Han gave birth to a daughter in Richmond, B.C.

[20] On September 17, 2018, Mr. Dorje wrote, ”Taking care of her and you are my duty for life”.

[21] Ms. Han’s expectation was that the parties would live together in the future. She says they planned to live together. Those plans evolved over time. Initially they involved purchasing a property in Toronto, so that Mr. Dorje could visit when he was in New York. They also discussed purchasing property in Calgary or renting a home in Vancouver for that purpose. Ms. Han eventually purchased a condominium in Richmond using funds provided by Mr. Dorje.

[22] Ms. Han deposes that the parties made plans for Mr. Dorje to visit her and meet the child in Richmond. In October 2018, however, Mr. Dorje wrote that he needed to “disappear” to Europe. He wrote:

I will definitely find a way to meet her

And you

Remember to take care of yourself if something happens

[23] The final plan the parties discussed, according to Ms. Han, was that Mr. Dorje would sponsor Ms. Han and the child to immigrate to the United States and live at the Kagyu retreat centre in New York State.

[24] In January 2019, Ms. Han lost contact with Mr. Dorje.

[25] Ms. Han commenced this family law case on July 17, 2019, seeking child support, a declaration of parentage and a parentage test. She did not seek spousal support.

[26] Ms. Han first proposed a claim for spousal support in October 2020 after a change in her counsel. Following an exchange of correspondence concerning an application for leave to amend the notice of family claim, Ms. Han’s counsel wrote that Ms. Han would not be advancing a spousal support claim. On March 16, 2020, counsel reversed course, and advised that Ms. Han had instructed him to proceed with the application.

[27] When this application came on before me, the trial was set to commence on June 7, 2021. The parties were still in the process of discoveries and obtaining translations for hundreds of pages of documents in Chinese characters.

[28] At a trial management conference on May 6, 2021, noting the parties were not ready to proceed, Madam Justice Walkem adjourned the trial to April 11, 2022.

ANALYSIS
A. The Spousal Support Claim in this Case
[29] To claim spousal support in this case, Ms. Han must plead that she lived with Mr. Dorje in a marriage-like relationship. This is because only “spouses” are entitled to spousal support, and s. 3 of the Family Law Act defines a spouse as a person who is married or has lived with another person in a marriage-like relationship:

3 (1) A person is a spouse for the purposes of this Act if the person

(a) is married to another person, or

(b) has lived with another person in a marriage-like relationship, and

(i) has done so for a continuous period of at least 2 years, or

(ii) except in Parts 5 [Property Division] and 6 [Pension Division], has a child with the other person.

[30] Because she alleges she has a child with Mr. Dorje, Ms. Han need not allege that the relationship endured for a continuous period of two years to claim spousal support; but she must allege that she lived in a marriage-like relationship with him at some point in time. Accordingly, she must amend the notice of family claim.

B. The Test to Amend Pleadings
[31] Given that the notice of trial has been served, Ms. Han requires leave of the court to amend the notice of family claim: Supreme Court Family Rule 8-1(1)(b)(i).

[32] A person seeking to amend a notice of family claim must show that there is a reasonable cause of action. This is a low threshold. What the applicant needs to establish is that, if the facts pleaded are proven at trial, they would support a reasonable claim. The applicant’s allegations of fact are assumed to be true for the purposes of this analysis. Cantelon v. Wall, 2015 BCSC 813, at para. 7-8.

[33] The applicant’s delay, the reasons for the delay, and the prejudice to the responding party are also relevant factors. The ultimate consideration is whether it would be just and convenient to allow the amendment. Cantelon, at para. 6, citing Teal Cedar Products Ltd. v. Dale Intermediaries Ltd. et al (1986), 19 B.C.L.R. (3d) 282.

C. Pleadings in Family Law Cases
[34] Supreme Court Family Rules 3-1(1) and 4-1(1) require that a claim to spousal support be pleaded in a notice of family claim in Form F3. Section 2 of Form F3, “Spousal relationship history”, requires a spousal support claimant to check the boxes that apply to them, according to whether they are or have been married or are or have been in a marriage-like relationship. Where a claimant alleges a marriage-like relationship, Form F3 requires that they provide the date on which they began to live together with the respondent in a marriage-like relationship and, where applicable, the date on which they separated. Form F3 does not require a statement of the factual basis for the claim of spousal support.

[35] In this case, Ms. Han seeks to amend the notice of family claim to allege that she and Mr. Dorje began to live in a marriage-like relationship in or around January 2018, and separated in or around January 2019.

[36] An allegation that a person lived with a claimant in a marriage-like relationship is a conclusion of law, not an allegation of fact. Unlike the rules governing pleadings in civil actions, however, the Supreme Court Family Rules do not expressly require family law claimants to plead the material facts in support of conclusions of law.

[37] In other words, there is no express requirement in the Supreme Court Family Rules that Ms. Han plead the facts on which she relies for the allegation she and Mr. Dorje lived in a marriage-like relationship.

[38] Rule 4-6 authorizes a party to demand particulars, and then apply to the court for an order for further and better particulars, of a matter stated in a pleading. However, unless and until she is granted leave and files the proposed amended notice of family claim, Ms. Han’s allegation of a marriage-like relationship is not a matter stated in a pleading.

[39] Ms. Han filed an affidavit in support of her application to amend the notice of family claim. Normally, evidence would not be required or admissible on an application to amend a pleading. However, in the unusual circumstances of this case, the parties agreed I may look to Ms. Han’s affidavit and exhibits for the facts she pleads in support of the allegation of a marriage-like relationship.

[40] Because this is an application to amend - and Ms. Han’s allegations of fact are presumed to be true - I have not considered Mr. Dorje’s responding affidavit.

[41] Relying on affidavit evidence for an application to amend pleadings is less than ideal. It tends to merge and confuse the material facts with the evidence that would be relied on to prove those facts. In a number of places in her affidavit, for example, Ms. Han describes her feelings, impressions and understandings. A person’s hopes and intentions are not normally material facts unless they are mutual or reasonably held. The facts on which Ms. Han alleges she and Mr. Dorje formed a marriage-like relationship are more important for the present purposes than her belief they entered into a conjugal union.

[42] Somewhat unusually, in this case, almost all of the parties’ relevant communications were in writing. This makes it somewhat easier to separate the facts from the evidence; however, as stated above, it is difficult to understand the intentions and actions of a person from brief text messages.

[43] In my view, it would be a good practice for applicants who seek to amend their pleadings in family law cases to provide opposing counsel and the court with a schedule of the material facts on which they rely for the proposed amendment.

D. The Legal Concept of a Marriage-Like Relationship
[44] As Mr. Justice Myers observed in Mother 1 v. Solus Trust Company, 2019 BCSC 200, the concept of a marriage-like relationship is elastic and difficult to define. This elasticity is illustrated by the following passage from Yakiwchuk v. Oaks, 2003 SKQB 124, quoted by Myers J. at para. 133 of Mother 1:

[10] Spousal relationships are many and varied. Individuals in spousal relationships, whether they are married or not, structure their relationships differently. In some relationships there is a complete blending of finances and property - in others, spouses keep their property and finances totally separate and in still others one spouse may totally control those aspects of the relationship with the other spouse having little or no knowledge or input. For some couples, sexual relations are very important - for others, that aspect may take a back seat to companionship. Some spouses do not share the same bed. There may be a variety of reasons for this such as health or personal choice. Some people are affectionate and demonstrative. They show their feelings for their “spouse” by holding hands, touching and kissing in public. Other individuals are not demonstrative and do not engage in public displays of affection. Some “spouses” do everything together - others do nothing together. Some “spouses” vacation together and some spend their holidays apart. Some “spouses” have children - others do not. It is this variation in the way human beings structure their relationships that make the determination of when a “spousal relationship” exists difficult to determine. With married couples, the relationship is easy to establish. The marriage ceremony is a public declaration of their commitment and intent. Relationships outside marriage are much more difficult to ascertain. Rarely is there any type of “public” declaration of intent. Often people begin cohabiting with little forethought or planning. Their motivation is often nothing more than wanting to “be together”. Some individuals have chosen to enter relationships outside marriage because they did not want the legal obligations imposed by that status. Some individuals have simply given no thought as to how their relationship would operate. Often the date when the cohabitation actually began is blurred because people “ease into” situations, spending more and more time together. Agreements between people verifying when their relationship began and how it will operate often do not exist.

[45] In Mother 1, Mr. Justice Myers referred to a list of 22 factors grouped into seven categories, from Maldowich v. Penttinen, (1980), 17 R.F.L. (2d) 376 (Ont. Dist. Ct.), that have frequently been cited in this and other courts for the purpose of determining whether a relationship was marriage-like, at para. 134 of Mother 1:

1. Shelter:

(a) Did the parties live under the same roof?

(b) What were the sleeping arrangements?

(c) Did anyone else occupy or share the available accommodation?

2. Sexual and Personal Behaviour:

(a) Did the parties have sexual relations? If not, why not?

(b) Did they maintain an attitude of fidelity to each other?

(c) What were their feelings toward each other?

(d) Did they communicate on a personal level?

(e) Did they eat their meals together?

(f) What, if anything, did they do to assist each other with problems or during illness?

(g) Did they buy gifts for each other on special occasions?

3. Services:

What was the conduct and habit of the parties in relation to:

(a) preparation of meals;

(b) washing and mending clothes;

(c) shopping;

(d) household maintenance; and

(e) any other domestic services?

4. Social:

(a) Did they participate together or separately in neighbourhood and community activities?

(b) What was the relationship and conduct of each of them toward members of their respective families and how did such families behave towards the parties?

5. Societal:

What was the attitude and conduct of the community toward each of them and as a couple?

6. Support (economic):

(a) What were the financial arrangements between the parties regarding the provision of or contribution toward the necessaries of life (food, clothing, shelter, recreation, etc.)?

(b) What were the arrangements concerning the acquisition and ownership of property?

(c) Was there any special financial arrangement between them which both agreed would be determinant of their overall relationship?

7. Children:

What was the attitude and conduct of the parties concerning children?

[46] In Austin v. Goerz, 2007 BCCA 586, the Court of Appeal cautioned against a “checklist approach”; rather, a court should "holistically" examine all the relevant factors. Cases like Molodowich provide helpful indicators of the sorts of behaviour that society associates with a marital relationship, the Court of Appeal said; however, “the presence or absence of any particular factor cannot be determinative of whether a relationship is marriage-like” (para. 58).

[47] In Weber v. Leclerc, 2015 BCCA 492, the Court of Appeal again affirmed that there is no checklist of characteristics that will be found in all marriages and then concluded with respect to evidence of intentions:

[23] The parties’ intentions – particularly the expectation that the relationship will be of lengthy, indeterminate duration – may be of importance in determining whether a relationship is “marriage-like”. While the court will consider the evidence expressly describing the parties’ intentions during the relationship, it will also test that evidence by considering whether the objective evidence is consonant with those intentions.

[24] The question of whether a relationship is “marriage-like” will also typically depend on more than just their intentions. Objective evidence of the parties’ lifestyle and interactions will also provide direct guidance on the question of whether the relationship was “marriage-like”.

[48] Significantly for this case, the courts have looked to mutual intent in order to find a marriage-like relationship. See, for example, L.E. v. D.J., 2011 BCSC 671 and Buell v. Unger, 2011 BCSC 35; Davey Estate v. Gruyaert, 2005 CarswellBC 3456 at 13 and 35.

[49] In Mother 1, Myers J. concluded his analysis of the law with the following learned comment:

[143] Having canvassed the law relating to the nature of a marriage-like relationship, I will digress to point out the problematic nature of the concept. It may be apparent from the above that determining whether a marriage-like relationship exists sometimes seems like sand running through one's fingers. Simply put, a marriage-like relationship is akin to a marriage without the formality of a marriage. But as the cases mentioned above have noted, people treat their marriages differently and have different conceptions of what marriage entails.

[50] In short, the determination of whether the parties in this case lived in a marriage-like relationship is a fact-specific inquiry that a trial judge would need to make on a “holistic” basis, having regard to all of the evidence. While the trial judge may consider the various factors listed in the authorities, those factors would not be treated as a checklist and no single factor or category of factors would be treated as being decisive.

E. Is There a Reasonable Claim of a Marriage-Like Relationship?
[51] In this case, many of the Molodowich factors are missing:

a) The parties never lived under the same roof. They never slept together. They were never in the same place at the same time during the relationship. The last time they saw each other in person was in November 2017, before the relationship began.

b) The parties never had consensual sex. They did not hug, kiss or hold hands. With the exception of the alleged sexual assault, they never touched one another physically.

c) The parties expressed care and affection for one another, but they rarely shared personal information or interest in their lives outside of their direct topic of communication. They did not write about their families, their friends, their religious beliefs or their work.

d) They expressed concern and support for one another when the other felt unwell or experienced health issues, but they did not provide any care or assistance during illness or other problems.

e) They did not assist one another with domestic chores.

f) They did not share their relationship with their peers or their community. There is no allegation, for example, that Mr. Dorje told his fellow monks or any of his followers about the relationship. There is no allegation that Ms. Han told her friends or any co-workers. Indeed, there is no allegation that anyone, with the exception of Ms. Han’s mother, knew about the relationship. Although Mr. Dorje gave Ms. Han’s mother a gift, he never met the mother and he never spoke to her.

g) They did not intend to have a child together. The child was conceived as a result of a sexual assault. While Mr. Dorje expressed interest in “meeting” the child, he never followed up. He currently has no relationship with the child. There is no allegation he has sought access or parenting arrangements.

[52] The only Molodowich factor of any real relevance in this case is economic support. Mr. Dorje provided the funds with which Ms. Han purchased a condominium. Mr. Dorje initially wrote that he wanted to buy a property with the money, but, he wrote, “It’s the same thing if you buy [it]”.

[53] Mr. Dorje also provided a significant amount of money for Ms. Han’s postpartum care and the child’s first year of life.

[54] This financial support may have been primarily for the benefit of the child. Even the condominium, Ms. Han wrote, was primarily for the benefit of the child.

[55] However, in my view, a trial judge may attach a broader significance to the financial support from Mr. Dorje than child support alone. A trial judge may find that the money Mr. Dorje provided to Ms. Han at her request was an expression of his commitment to her in circumstances in which he could not commit physically. The money and the gifts may be seen by the trial judge to have been a form of down payment by Mr. Dorje on a promise of continued emotional and financial support for Ms. Han, or, in Mr. Dorje’s own words, “Taking care of her and you are my duty for life” (emphasis added).

[56] On the other hand, I find it difficult to attach any particular significance to the fact that Mr. Dorje agreed to provide funds for Ms. Han to purchase a wedding ring. It appears to me that Ms. Han demanded that Mr. Dorje buy her a wedding ring, not that the ring had any mutual meaning to the parties as a marriage symbol. But it is relevant, in my view, that Mr. Dorje provided $20,000 USD to Ms. Han for something she wanted that was of no benefit to the child.

[57] Further, Ms. Han alleges that the parties intended to live together. At a minimum, a trial judge may find that the discussions about where Ms. Han and the child would live reflected a mutual intention of the parties to see one another and spend time together when they could.

[58] Mr. Dorje argues that an intention to live together at some point in the future is not sufficient to show that an existing relationship was marriage-like. He argues that the question of whether the relationship was marriage-like requires more than just intentions, citing Weber, supra.

[59] In my view, the documentary evidence referred to above provides some objective evidence in this case that the parties progressed beyond mere intentions. As stated, the parties appear to have expressed genuine care and affection for one another. They appear to have discussed marriage, trust, honesty, finances, mutual obligations and acquiring family property. These are not matters one would expect Mr. Dorje to discuss with a friend or a follower, or even with the mother of his child, without a marriage-like element of the relationship.

[60] A trial judge may find on the facts alleged by Ms. Han that the parties loved one another and would have lived together, but were unable to do so because of Mr. Dorje’s religious duties and nomadic lifestyle.

[61] The question I raised in the introduction to these reasons is whether a relationship that began on-line and never moved into the physical world can be marriage-like.

[62] Notably, the definition of a spouse in the Family Law Act does not require that the parties live together, only that they live with another person in a marriage-like relationship.

[63] In Connor Estate, 2017 BCSC 978, Mr. Justice Kent found that a couple that maintained two entirely separate households and never lived under the same roof formed a marriage-like relationship. (Connor Estate was decided under the intestacy provisions of the Wills, Estates and Succession Act, S.B.C. 2009, c. 13 ("WESA"), but courts have relied on cases decided under WESA and the FLA interchangeably for their definitions of a spouse.) Mr. Justice Kent found:

[50] The evidence is overwhelming and I find as a fact that Mr. Chambers and Ms. Connor loved and cared deeply about each other, and that they had a loving and intimate relationship for over 20 years that was far more than mere friendship or even so-called "friendship with benefits". I accept Mr. Chambers' evidence that he would have liked to share a home with Ms. Connor after the separation from his wife, but was unable to do so because of Ms. Connor's hoarding illness. The evidence amply supports, and I find as a fact, that Mr. Chambers and Ms. Connor loved each other, were faithful to each other, communicated with each other almost every day when they were not together, considered themselves to be (and presented themselves to be) "husband and wife" and were accepted by all who knew them as a couple.

[64] Connor Estate may be distinguishable from this case because Mr. Chambers and Ms. Connor were physically intimate for over 20 years, and presented themselves to the world as a married couple.

[65] Other decisions in which a marriage-like relationship has been found to exist despite the parties not living together have involved circumstances in which the couple lived under the same roof at previous points in the relationship, and the issue was whether they continued to be spouses after they took up separate residences: in Thompson v. Floyd, 2001 BCCA 78, the parties had lived together for a period of at least 11 years; in Roach v. Dutra, 2010 BCCA 264, the parties had lived together for approximately three years.

[66] However, as Mr. Justice Kent noted in Connor Estate:

[48] … [W]hile much guidance might be found in this case law, the simple fact is that no two cases are identical (and indeed they usually vary widely) and it is the assessment of evidence as a whole in this particular case which matters.

[67] Mr. Justice Kent concluded:

[53] Like human beings themselves, marriage-like relationships can come in many and various shapes. In this particular case, I have no doubt that such a relationship existed …

[68] As stated, Ms. Han’s claim is novel. It may even be weak. Almost all of the traditional factors are missing. The fact that Ms. Han and Mr. Dorje never lived under the same roof, never shared a bed and never even spent time together in person will militate against a finding they lived with one another in a marriage-like relationship. However, the traditional factors are not a mandatory check-list that confines the “elastic” concept of a marriage-like relationship. And if the COVID pandemic has taught us nothing else, it is that real relationships can form, blossom and end in virtual worlds.

[69] In my view, the merits of Ms. Han’s claim should be decided on the evidence. Subject to an overriding prejudice to Mr. Dorje, she should have leave to amend the notice of family claim. However, she should also provide meaningful particulars of the alleged marriage-like relationship.

F. Delay / Prejudice
[70] Ms. Han filed her notice of family claim on July 17, 2019. She brought this application to amend approximately one year and nine months after she filed the pleading, just over two months before the original trial date.

[71] Ms. Han’s delay was made all that more remarkable by her change in position from January 19, 2021, when she confirmed, through counsel, that she was not seeking spousal support in this case.

[72] Ms. Han gave notice of her intention to proceed with this application to Mr. Dorje on March 16, 2021. By the time the application was heard, the parties had conducted examinations for discovery without covering the issues that would arise from a claim of spousal support.

[73] Also, in April, Ms. Han produced additional documents, primarily text messages, that may be relevant to her claim of spousal support, but were undecipherable to counsel for Mr. Dorje, who does not read Mandarin.

[74] This application proceeded largely on documents selected and translated by counsel for Ms. Han. I was informed that Mandarin translations of the full materials would take 150 days.

[75] Understandably in the circumstances, Mr. Dorje argued that an amendment two months before trial would be neither just nor convenient. He argued that he would be prejudiced by an adjournment so as to allow Ms. Han to advance a late claim of spousal support.

[76] The circumstances changed on May 6, 2021, when Madam Justice Walkem adjourned the trial to July 2022 and reset it for 25 days. Madam Justice Walkem noted that most of the witnesses live internationally and require translators. She also noted that paternity may be in issue, and Mr. Dorje may amend his pleadings to raise that issue. It seems clear that, altogether apart from the potential spousal support claim, the parties were not ready to proceed to trial on June 7, 2021.

[77] In my view, any remaining prejudice to Mr. Dorje is outweighed by the importance of having all of the issues between the parties decided on their merits.

[78] Ms. Han’s delay and changes of position on spousal support may be a matter to de addressed in a future order of costs; but they are not grounds on which to deny her leave to amend the notice of family claim.

CONCLUSION
[79] Ms. Han is granted leave to amend her notice of family claim in the form attached as Appendix A to the notice of application to include a claim for spousal support.

[80] Within 21 days, or such other deadline as the parties may agree, Ms. Han must provide particulars of the marriage-like relationship alleged in the amended notice of family claim.

[81] Ms. Han is entitled to costs of this application in the cause of the spousal support claim.

“Master Elwood”

Question 3

love and lost meaning文茜的世界周報 Sisy's World News 在Facebook 的評價

Accepted Answer

《我的幸福5/2 週末》*週日下午兩點誠品信義書店「廿世紀典範人物」新書分享會，我下午二時開始演講，離上次在台灣大學公開演説。快半年了！分享會報名一小時預告已額滿，但TVBS電視台慷慨的支持。派出SNG車，屆時TVBS文茜的世界周報YouTube 及世界周報Facebook 都將同步直播。*新書分享會後我將直奔高雄衛武營，參加劉孟捷（李斯特巡禮之年）鋼琴獨奏會。這是劉孟捷回台，最重要的一場音樂會，我目睹他用盡了一切心力。過去即使21歲時在費城代打缺席大師的音樂會，劉孟捷都未曾如此緊張。他此次回台，手術前為了沒有遺憾，共舉行三場音樂會：其中4/17與5/30皆是與國家交響樂團NSO合作：530那一場指揮是呂紹嘉。但他告訴我，某些曲目對他而言，是Piece of Cake ：惟獨衞武營這一場，曲目由他自己決定，現場錄影，並且找了金曲獎錄音師同步錄音。5/2衛武營-劉孟捷鋼琴獨奏會《李斯特巡禮之年》購票連結https://www.opentix.life/event/1384752689074294784劉夢捷明白他即將面對一個大手術，手術風險之外，他的免疫系統疾病，將使他的康復之路更長。沒有人可以預知未來，為了圓他的夢，醫院每天都要求他早上、晚上量血壓，報告直接傳給院長。振興醫院院長魏崢雖然是亞洲第一把心臟外科醫師，但也不敢大意。畢竟這個人的生命那麼脆弱，他的心臟主動脈剝離，那是實質的「心碎」了：但他仍有詩，仍有音樂夢。在生命的交接處，在白日與黑夜的交义口，劉孟捷想為他的音樂生涯，留下最美好的紀錄。他選擇了李斯特。在這場音樂會前，他甚至以英文寫下了自己與音樂、疾病的半生回顧：如李斯特的巡禮，有仰望，有沉思，有失落，有幽微的疼痛。他以詩篇般的演奏模式，傾訴，詠嘆。他曾得到天賦，也走過死蔭的幽谷。命運是一層又一層的黑影逼近，老天爺隨時想帶走他。而他已不再流淚，不再沉浸於悲愴告別：因為對他而言活著並不容易，他要讓自己更深刻的抓住每一分時光之美。如果時間和空間，正如哲人們所形容的都是不實際存在的東西：那從不感到衰敗的太陽，也不會比我們了不起多少！他如艾略特的詩句中所形容的：我們為什麼要如此貪心總在祈禱，想活上整整一個世紀？蝴蝶雖僅活了一天，已經歷了永恆。當他的身軀如露水還在藤蔓顫抖時，他送給我們一場「完全浪漫又超技的李斯特」。等音樂會結束了，至少有一張CD，一段YouTube 影像：不論孟捷代表生命的那朵鮮花是否枯萎，他彈奏如天使的音聲不會飛離，它會停留在那夜，繼續釋放芬芳。這是盡生命之力、之情獨奏的音樂會。劉孟捷説：這樣當他走進手術室時，會少一點悲傷。或許快樂的日子本來就不多，但讓這場「完全李斯特．完全劉孟捷」的獨奏會放出神聖的光彩吧！我必將赴會，不會錯過！我知道此刻的獨奏會，很難複製，因為它綜合了太多的情感、愛念，釋放與生命的抒情。*劉孟捷為此次獨奏會寫下的文字：This past year has seen some unprecedented changes in the world. Many lives have been lost and many have changed. The world has changed while many of us confront the uncertainty of the future. For most musicians, life has changed. For months, we have been conducting our lessons online, and concerts have mostly stopped or become an online experience as well. More time has been spent learning how to improve the online teaching experience than one could have imagined. While I have felt the duty to continue teaching, the format the pandemic requires for teaching leaves me unwilling to spend more time than I have to. And truly, I have had other things to deal with. When the pandemic started to worry the American public in March, I was in the middle of a tour with the String Quartet-in-Residence at Curtis, the Vera Quartet. However, our concerts were canceled, and everything came to a sudden halt. I felt the universe had sent me an unexpected gift, as I had also just received some terrible news concerning my worsening aortic arches and a diagnosis of kidney cancer. The sudden halt in my professional schedule seemed perfect in its timing. I was able to settle into a monastic existence, to simply practice and attempt to heal. I see many musicians itching to be concertizing again, and many stepped into new territory, performing on the internet. Many took time to develop new podcasts, and to write new materials for their art. Sadly, many have struggled as they have fallen into desperation without any concert incomes. Altogether the music industry seems to be in peril, and many worry about  how music and musicians will survive. However, I had my own survival to think about. Having been through many difficult experiences in my life, I knew this might be the most difficult I would encounter. My Doctors describe me as a walking time bomb. My condition could be lethal at any moment if my blood pressure gets out of control. So while others wrestle with the fate of the music industry, I’ve needed to face my own fate and mortality. Playing concerts can mean many things to people. At different times throughout my life, I’ve felt the need to express different aspects of myself. When I was young, I wanted to embody the spirit of romanticism, playing lots of Chopin and Schumann. Then there was a period of time when I wanted to challenge myself by showing off pyrotechnics. I had a brooding period where I turned to the pathos of Rachmaninoff, and then felt the need to return to the purity of Schubert and nobility of Brahms. Throughout this pandemic, I wanted to play Bach. Through Bach’s music I found a kind of spiritual sanctuary. In considering the program for this concert, I felt again the urge to play music that reflects my current feelings and state of mind. The title of today’s recital, “Years of Pilgrimage” seems to fit exactly what I am experiencing. Liszt wrote several volumes of “Années de pèlerinage” throughout his life to reflect on thoughts he had during his travels. He links his philosophical thoughts to the scenery which inspired them.  “Au Bord d’un Source” describes feelings of rejuvenation while standing next to a clear stream of water, a symbol and source of life and energy. It seems to say, when the stream is so pure, life can be so full of joy. In the Les jeux deaux à la Villa dEste (The Fountains of the Villa dEste), the water has a magical and supernatural quality, as Liszt himself wrote in the inscription: But the water that I shall give him shall become in him a well of water springing up into eternal life,( from the Gospel of John.) For me, I have never felt more connected to Liszt than when he looked upon the valley of Obermann and questioned the meaning of existence. At this moment in my life, I often find myself reflecting my experiences of what I see and read into philosophical musings. Perhaps many people come to a time when this is so. In all this I have felt gratitude for the love stories and sonnets that one can romantically indulge in, and for storms so violent that they threaten to destroy one’s spirit, even the hell-bound journey which brings up questions about the purpose of life… On this journey, I felt full and alive as a human being. Looking back on this journey, I am grateful for everything, whether happy or sad, to have made an impact, found and imparted meaning to this life. The unusual time of this pandemic has marked a milestone for me. I have journeyed back home, and as it happened, this is the first time I have spent so much time in my hometown Kaohsiung in over 35 years. It’s particularly nostalgic to play these pieces as some of them were significant in my early musical career. Vallée d’Obermann was the piece I played in my first competition at the junior high school level, in which I won first prize on the national level, which allowed me to be qualified to apply for a special permission to study abroad. This meant my dream to be educated as a musician could be continued in an environment where I could develop fully. In the following year when I was 13, I won the first Asia-Pacific Youth PIano Competition with the Dante Sonata. The competition catapulted me into national attention as I was headlined in several newspapers, and especially since it was held in Kaohsiung, I became a local hero as well. During the same event, I had a fateful meeting with one of the important influences in my life, Mr. Gary Graffman, who then mentored me throughout not only the years when I was studying at Curtis, but throughout my illness and recovery as a pianist. Right before I departed to study in Philadelphia, I played my first solo recital throughout Taiwan, and along with the Dante Sonata, I also performed the three sonnets. It’s perfect that now, back in Kaohsiung, all these memories have flooded back into my head. I feel so lucky to have been born here, and to have met my first teacher, Chin-Li Lee, who inspired me on the path to become a musician. Prof. Alexander Sung filled me with dreams of becoming an artist. I am grateful for his belief in my talent, when he chose to give a 12 year old such philosophical pieces to play. Having once again spent some months in Kaohsiung, I can freshly appreciate the source of inspiration it once was for me. I have returned to the source to heal. Having already glimpsed hell’s gate several times, battered and weathered by the storms of life, I know there is a reason life is this way, and it all will be alright.  Meng-Chieh LiuApril, 2021 *劉孟捷衛武營《李斯特巡禮之年》演奏會中，包括李斯特以佩脫拉克三首情詩譜寫的鋼琴琴詩：這三首情詩是從大詩人佩脫拉克一百多首情詩挑出來的，詩本身就很優美，依此激發李斯特的浪漫主義創作靈感，成為琴藝上最困難演奏，但也特別細膩溫柔的琴詩。這三首分別是：〈佩脫拉克第47號十四行詩〉〈佩脫拉克第104號十四行詩〉及〈佩脫拉克第123號十四行詩〉。Franz Liszt（1811-1886）: Sonetto 47 del Petrarca, Sonetto 104 del Petrarca, Sonetto 123 del Petrarca, from Années de pèlerinage, Deuxième année: Italie李斯特於1846年先出版藝術歌曲《三首佩脫拉克十四行詩》（Tre sonetti del Petrarca），再改成鋼琴獨奏版。三首佩脫拉克十四行詩中譯：焦元溥（元溥也是友情贊助，特別準備音樂資料，周日南下，聆賞劉孟捷的樂曲，並且陪同他盯著錄音共三天）〈第47〉祝福每天、每月、每年，             所有片刻與鐘點、時間與季節，       在那美麗的原野，                     我為一雙眼眸魂縈夢牽。              祝福初遇時的甜，                   與愛同在、受苦不停歇，             如弓箭刺穿令我淌血，               傷口永留感動在我心間。             祝福一切我發出的聲音，             當呼喚著我深愛的女郎，             渴望、嘆息、淚濕滿襟。             祝福我寫下的文字遠揚，             歌頌她的芳名，萬古長新。              我心永屬於她，無人能闖。           〈第104〉我找不到和平，也無意打仗，                   我恐懼、我期望，燃燒又冰透。                 我向天飛升，卻躺在地上，                     我一無所有，卻又擁抱整個宇宙。                 我身陷囹圄，監牢又開敞；                     我不受囚禁，卻銬著鎖頭。                     愛情不讓我死，也不讓我飛翔；                 不要我活，也不准我逃離悲愁。                  欲看卻無眼，啞口還在發言，                     我甘心殞滅，卻仍高聲呼救，                    我痛恨自己，但仍愛著他人。                    憂傷滋潤我，淚水伴隨笑臉，                     生命不足惜，死亡也不煩憂；                    我淪落至此，都是妳啊，我的愛人！              〈第123〉我在塵世見到仙子的美，    她天堂般優雅無與倫比。                想起她讓我悲傷又歡喜，                所見如幻夢迷霧與幽黑。                 妳的可愛眼睛使我落淚，                多少次讓太陽也要妒忌。                我還聽到四周發出嘆息，                移動了山嶽停止了河水。                愛情智慧憐憫憂傷財富，                在淚水中形成甜美聲響，                奇妙和諧世上未曾目睹。                天堂追隨著音樂的流淌，                雖然枝上樹葉並未飛舞，                空氣與風息卻充滿芬芳。5/2衛武營-劉孟捷鋼琴獨奏會《李斯特巡禮之年》購票連結https://www.opentix.life/event/1384752689074294784

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