【一切的失敗和不足,都是最美好的安排】
All Failures & Lacks Are The Best Things to Happen to Us
三個月前,收到來自台灣客人的這封電郵時,開心和心酸交織著在心裡。
開心,因為這是一年前通過Zoom視訊的客人。他居然在我們看八字的一週年,特地寫了封感謝函給我,真有心!
心酸,因為他寫在電郵裡的低落心情,我完完全全明白。
他的經歷,是我的曾經。我當初也是很難,很久才能走出來。
有一回,我為一位芳華正茂的女子批八字時,她很用心的寫下我說的話。
論寫筆記的完整,她是我客人當中的佼佼者。
寫到一半,我注意到她的右手開始微微顫抖。我以為是空調的風太大了,冷到她,便問她要不要披巾。
她說,是她的焦慮症發作。
「我沒在兇你,也沒對你嚴厲,你為何突然焦慮?」
「我.....打從今年疫情打亂了我的計畫,我就一直很焦慮。我覺得我很沒用,同學們都前進了,只有我現在什麼都不是,亂糟糟的。我就一直很緊張,萬一我一直都是這樣,怎麼辦?」
說著,她眼眶一紅,眼淚像斷了線的珍珠鏈似的灑下來。
我的媽呀!是我的樣子長得很催淚,還是我的聲音聽起來很虐心?怎麼客人,不分男女老少,東南西北,看到我好像都很容易哭?
我抓起一張紙巾遞給她。
「所以,我不是來了嗎?你來找我,就是要問個明路,而你很幸運那麼快就看到我啦!你看你的筆記寫得多工整,多齊全。我很多客人都不如你啊!我今天的工作,就是來給你答案的。我沒有把握,也不會接你這份差事。我接了,就代表還可以補救。你照著我的指示去做,一定柳暗花明又一村。」
又另一回,一位四十多歲的媽媽請我看兒子的八字。
我在批著八字時,這位媽媽點頭認同,然後就聲淚俱下。
我轉頭看著她沈默不語的先生。我說錯了什麼嗎?太太哭成淚人,你怎麼連紙巾也不拿給她啊?
「我是個沒有用的母親,很不稱職的母親。我沒有辦法教好孩子。我很愛他,可是很多時候我都不知道要怎麼做,我就會對他發脾氣,說狠話,過後我又後悔。我忍下來,可是後來還是會一樣!」
我沒打斷她,等她的哭聲逐漸小聲後,我柔柔的說:「我來啦!我坐在你前面了。你已經看到我,就是有辦法了。你知道你自己不行,會去找辦法,就代表你願意去學習做個好媽媽啊!」
我把紙巾遞給她,再說:「不要哭了,要不然,別人看了以為是我不要借你錢,才把你弄得那麼傷心。」
曾幾何時,我們都會以外在所擁有的,來定義自己的人生是否值得自己喜歡。
從原生家庭、樣貌、健康、身型、智力、天賦等,到後來的學歷、友情、事業、財富、婚姻、子女......
哪一樣沒有,而偏偏是我們最想要的,我們就會認定自己失敗的一塌糊塗。
我認為這就是普通教育最大的問題所在。父母老師都是這樣把我們「分門別類」的。值不值得父母疼愛或向親朋戚友炫耀,也離不開那幾點。
久而久之,我們也只會以「成功」來定義自己是否有價值,甚至來衡量自己是否有活下去的勇氣。
我比較喜歡佛法的定義。我們每個人都是一尊佛,六道眾生皆有佛性,只因一時的迷,因此墮落在苦輪不停的輪迴。
可正因為我們有佛性,我們都有無窮無盡的可能。每個人的內在有著很強大的力量,等著我們遇到明師後,去發掘、探索和了解。
而這天生俱來的力量,就是你改命立命的資本。
如果人生順風順水,我們永遠不會想要出離,誤把人間當極樂,所以一定要有苦,我們才會意識到,為什麼我們會在這鬼地方?要怎麼樣才可以離開這鬼地方去到極樂?
反過來,我們都應該感恩自己遇到的挫折,因為從這些苦中,我們才能生出智慧。
沒有一個八字是完美的。一切的失敗和不足,都是最美好的安排,如此你才會有出離心,返本歸源。
_______________________
3 months ago, when I received this email from my Taiwan client, there was this feeling of bittersweetness.
I was happy because this was the client I did a Zoom consultation last June. He sent me this email on the one-year anniversary date of our Zoom call, to express his gratitude. How sweet!
On the other hand, I could relate to the emotional turmoil he felt at that point in his life.
His experience was my past. It also took me a very long time to walk out from my gloominess.
Once, I analysed the Bazi of a very young lady. She was meticulously jotting down notes as I spoke.
Her detailed note-taking skills easily took the top place among my clients.
Halfway through, I noticed her right hand was trembling slightly. I thought it was due to the cold draft from the air conditioning, so I asked if she needed a shawl.
She replied that it was her anxiety disorder acting up.
“I was not fierce or strict with you. What caused your sudden anxiety?”
“I…ever since the pandemic disrupted my plans, I have been in this state of anxiety. I kept feeling useless. All my classmates are progressing expect me. I have nothing to show for and my life is in a mess. I am very anxious. What if I continue to be like this? What am I going to do?”
As she spoke, her eyes turned red and tears started rolling down like a broken strand of pearl necklace scattering onto the ground.
Oh dear! I am beginning to wonder if I have a tear-jerker face or a heart-tormenting voice. Why do my clients, regardless of gender and age, North South or East West, seem to cry easily when they see me?
I grabbed a piece of tissue and handed it to her.
“Ain’t I here already? You came to me for a roadmap and you are very lucky to see me so soon. Look at how precise and neat your notes are! Many of my clients aren’t even on par with you. My job today is to give you answers. If I didn’t have the confidence, I would not have taken up your request. Now that I did, that means there is still hope. If you follow my instructions, you will see things looking up very soon.”
On another occasion, a mother in her forties came to me for her son’s Bazi consultation.
As I was analysing, the mother nodded her head in agreement. The next thing I know, she started weeping loudly.
I turned to look at her husband, who had been silent all along. Did I say something wrong? And hello, your wife was crying. Why weren’t you gentleman enough to give her a tissue paper?
“I am a useless mother. I am incompetent. I do not know how to teach my son well. I love my son very much. But many times, I do not know what to do and thus I flare up at him and speak harshly. I always regret afterwards. I tried enduring but it still ends badly!”
I did not interrupt her and waited for her cries to soften, before speaking gently, “I’m here! I’m already sitting in front of you. You are looking at me now and that means help is here. You know that you are incompetent, so you went looking for solutions. That means you are willing to learn how to be a better mother!”
I handed a piece of tissue and said, “Don’t cry anymore, otherwise, other patrons will think that it’s because I refuse to lend you money.”
Since young, we have been using external possessions to define whether our lives are worth liking.
The family we are born into, our looks, health, body shape, intellect, talents, and then we move on to compare our academics, friendships, career, wealth, marriage and children.
If we are lacking in the area we covet most, we grade our lives as a failure.
I think this is the biggest problem in societal education. Our parents and teachers categorized us that way. Whether we as children are worthy of their love and bragging, depends on the few points above too.
Thus over time, we can only use the term “success” to determine whether we are of value, for some people, whether they should live on to take their next breath.
I very much prefer the definition in Buddhism. We are all Buddhas. Each and every sentient being in the six realms has a Buddha nature in them. But they got lost momentarily and fell into the endless wheel of reincarnation.
Yet, because of our Buddha nature, we have an unlimited source of potential. Every one of us has a very powerful strength inside us. It is just waiting for us to meet an accomplished teacher, so that we have the tools to explore and understand it:
And this strength that we are born with is the capital for us to transform and establish our own destiny.
If life is smooth-sailing, we would never want to leave and would mistake this mortal realm for Pureland. Thus, we all need sufferings, to realise that we should break out of this hell of a place. There has to be a better world somewhere. So how we get there?
We should, in fact, be grateful for all the setbacks and failures we have. Because it is from these sufferings, our wisdom arise:
No single Bazi is perfect. Every failure and lack we experience is the best arrangement for us, so that the heart of renunciation will arise in us and we will return to where we came from.
同時也有1部Youtube影片,追蹤數超過8萬的網紅與芬尼學英語 Finnie's Language Arts,也在其Youtube影片中提到,訂閱與芬尼學英語 ► http://bit.ly/flayt-sub 課程查詢 & 更多資源 ► http://bit.ly/fla-home 喜歡我們的短片嗎?到 Patreon 支持我們! ► http://bit.ly/fla-patreon ▍播放清單: 時事英語 ► h...
「follow up同義」的推薦目錄:
- 關於follow up同義 在 謙預 Qianyu.sg Facebook 的最佳解答
- 關於follow up同義 在 DJ Mykal a.k.a.林哲儀 Facebook 的精選貼文
- 關於follow up同義 在 Pinkpinkyanyoga Facebook 的最佳解答
- 關於follow up同義 在 與芬尼學英語 Finnie's Language Arts Youtube 的最讚貼文
- 關於follow up同義 在 [英中] 這句話中的follow up 有點怪- 看板Translation - 批踢踢 ... 的評價
- 關於follow up同義 在 follow-up醫學中文在PTT/Dcard完整相關資訊 - 數位感 的評價
- 關於follow up同義 在 follow-up醫學中文在PTT/Dcard完整相關資訊 - 數位感 的評價
follow up同義 在 DJ Mykal a.k.a.林哲儀 Facebook 的精選貼文
今天的穿搭配色很容易聯想到今天是Blue Monday吧!而且我意外發現還是8月30日。
為什麼特別提8月30日?因為2017年這天晚上是世大運閉幕,那時的軒然大波成就了我DJ生涯最Blue的一晚沒有之一(?😂😂),但也成就了我最自豪的一次DJ演出。
或許很多這一年多來收看 #居家華語派對房 DJ直播才開始follow我粉專的朋友沒聽過我當晚的演出,所以今天趁著這個「黃道吉日」(?)再分享一次這段Mix,同時也再介紹一次當時我的完整概念。
在確定受邀以DJ演出形式作為世大運閉幕式壓軸之後,經歷開會討論到最後曲目定案,我唯一不變的核心概念,就是希望能一如既往地在一些新舊電音國歌(從Underworld到Zomboy、Major Lazer等)當中,將來自台灣的好音樂或具代表性的名字融入我的DJ演出中,同時又能夠貼近世大運閉幕式的主軸。所以除了採用了周杰倫、五月天、蔡依林、伍佰、兄弟本色、金門王&李炳輝、林強等等的作品片段外,更在中後段的編排上隱含了「台北」跟「Happy Together」這樣的意涵,經歷12分鐘的DJ Set鋪陳後到最後結尾邀得紀曉君演唱原民古調的全新Remix版本,來象徵豐收成功的意味。
而當中用了OVDS的”No One Can Stop Us”是為了自己,告訴自己永遠不要忘了這條路為何走了20年到現在,不要忘了初衷。
另一個小插曲(?)是,我記得演出前一個月我把歌單排出來以後,經紀人曾問我:「紀宏仁這首〈城市台北〉你覺得有多少人記得?」我答「很少吧」。他問我那還要用嗎?我說要。
當時的想法是,我要站上這麼重要的舞台,除了面對這麼多人與執行團隊以外,我還必須面對我自己。如果要我把自己放掉,我就不需要站上這個舞台。我既然上去了,我要面對我是「DJ Mykal a.k.a.林哲儀」這件事,我就要清楚我是什麼樣的表演者,我是什麼風格,我是什麼樣的思維,我有義務、也有必要性呈現出來。
因此我在選歌的時候,我會很堅持某些對我影響很深遠的事情。譬如The Chemical Brothers或是The Prodigy。至於紀宏仁的〈城市台北〉除了曾是瓊斯杯的主題曲很契合這樣的場合,另一方面,紀宏仁也是我的華語電子音樂啟蒙之一。
說了這麼多,還是希望能讓大家在聽的時候,更能留意到「魔鬼藏在細節裡」,同時照例附上歌單:
1. Underworld - Born Slippy Nuxx
2. Queen - We Are the Champions
3. Queen - We Will Rock You b/w 紀宏仁 - 城市台北
4. 兄弟本色 - Fly Out (DJ Mykal a.k.a.林哲儀 mash-up bootleg edit) b/w The Chemical Brothers - Hey Boy, Hey Girl
5. The Prodigy - Voodoo People (Pendulum Remix) b/w 周杰倫 - 龍拳
6. OVDS - No One Can Stop Us (Djust Remix)
7. DJ Mykal a.k.a.林哲儀 - RKNIIFTR (☆Taku Takahashi Bowery Remix) b/w 蔡依林 - 大藝術家
8. 五月天 - 派對動物 (DJ Mykal a.k.a.林哲儀 Flip)
9. Zomboy - Like A B___h (Kill The Noise Remix) b/w MC HotDog - 我愛台妹
10. Skrillex & Diplo Present Jack Ü - Jungle Bae (feat. Bunji Garlin)
11. DJ Mykal a.k.a.林哲儀 - SUMMER BEACH b/w 林強 - 向前走
12. Major Lazer - Watch Out For This (Dimitri Vegas & Like Mike Tomorrowland Remix) b/w Madonna - Music / The Turtles - Happy Together / 金門王&李炳輝 - 流浪到淡水 / 伍佰 & China Blue - 台灣製造
13. 紀曉君 - 婦女除草完工祭古調 (鄭平 Remix)
#Mixcloud連結在留言裡
follow up同義 在 Pinkpinkyanyoga Facebook 的最佳解答
好開心可以參與 @unicefhk
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follow up同義 在 與芬尼學英語 Finnie's Language Arts Youtube 的最讚貼文
訂閱與芬尼學英語 ► http://bit.ly/flayt-sub
課程查詢 & 更多資源 ► http://bit.ly/fla-home
喜歡我們的短片嗎?到 Patreon 支持我們! ► http://bit.ly/fla-patreon
▍播放清單:
時事英語 ► https://www.youtube.com/playlist?list=PLs2gyIM_VlT84AoCFN-Nedf3nZXbrPsAp
Word Pairs 怎樣分 ► http://bit.ly/2hS1MCF
品牌名學英語 ► http://bit.ly/2qd3mUq
名人英語 ► https://www.youtube.com/playlist?list=PLs2gyIM_VlT9rX0D4JFat1u0l599g8kbv
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follow up同義 在 follow-up醫學中文在PTT/Dcard完整相關資訊 - 數位感 的推薦與評價
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follow up同義 在 follow-up醫學中文在PTT/Dcard完整相關資訊 - 數位感 的推薦與評價
關於「follow-up醫學中文」標籤,搜尋引擎有相關的訊息討論:. follow-up examination 是什麽意思,中文意思| 随访检查英文怎麽說...follow-up examination 隨訪檢查, ... ... <看更多>
follow up同義 在 [英中] 這句話中的follow up 有點怪- 看板Translation - 批踢踢 ... 的推薦與評價