用字遣詞的敏感度
快來看Presentality的最新英語寫作分析~
特別敏感的時刻,我們的用字遣詞也要特別小心。今天的「閱讀筆記」,我們來看前一陣子轟動矽谷的事件:知名軟體公司老闆在部落格的一篇 po 文,讓三分之一員工離職。他到底寫了什麼?
📌 總結幾個重點:
1. 在敏感時刻,用字跟語氣,甚至可能比內容還要重要。
2. 用簡短無修飾的句子,會顯得比較強硬,較長而且有修飾的句子,反而比較溫和。
3. 主詞非常,非常重要。你用的是 I, us vs them,還是 "we" and "our"?
如果以後你在情緒高漲的時刻寫文,也不妨寄給英文好而且中立的朋友,請他們評估文字所帶著的情緒,會很有幫助。
★★★★★★★★★★★★
📌 前一陣子,Basecamp 事件震驚美國科技/新創圈。
Basecamp 是一家團隊協作軟體公司,創辦人 Jason Fried 跟 David Heinemeier Hansson 一直都很願意為自己的理想及理念說話。他們寫的 Rework 一書影響了非常多的人,我在台灣認識的好幾位創業家都曾經跟我分享這本書。
但他們四月底在部落格上公告 Basecamp 一系列政策改變之後,引來非常大的反彈。
我第一時間就有去他們的部落格看他們寫的文章,覺得文筆非常好,而且是用說道理的語氣,很 reasonable。但發布不久,公司超過30%的員工,決定離職,其中包括好幾位高階主管!
What happened? 那篇文章,很顯然觸發了一個危機。我回去再把文章看了一次,發現天啊... 那篇文章的語氣,根本沒有我第一次看感覺的溫和。
Changes at Basecamp: https://bit.ly/2SNN6Kr
很多魔鬼都藏在細節裡。
★★★★★★★★★★★★
📌 主要的改變 = 工作時別討論政治或社會議題
讓大家最氣憤的政策改變,其實就只有一個:
No more societal and political discussions on our company Basecamp account.
在這個時空背景下,美國社會立場分歧這麼深,從左右派政治議題,到種族歧視問題,Basecamp 領導人大膽決定,禁止員工在公司內部的線上溝通頻道,討論社會及政治議題。
要去弄社會政治議題,可以,但請別在公司內。
★★★★★★★★★★★★
📌 開頭還算溫和:說服大家把公司當產品看待
一開頭,Fried 就寫:
At Basecamp, we treat our company as a product. It's not a rigid thing that exists, it's a flexible, malleable idea that evolves. We aren't stuck with what we have, we can create what we want. Just as we improve products through iteration, we iterate on our company too.
Hmmm,為什麼要這樣開頭?為什麼要把「公司」跟「產品」劃上等號?
我們可以想像,Fried 肯定為了這篇文煩惱了一陣子。很多想法不斷的在他腦中盤旋,不同的開場,不同的句子...
但這個開頭,是一個很不錯的 framing:因為 Basecamp 的員工肯定很多 product fanatics - 就是最在乎產品好不好的 "builders"。Product lovers 的一個共同點,就是了解產品是會不斷改變的東西。如果說公司也是,就可以理解,公司也會改變。
然後,他非常小心的挑選最正面的說法。每一字每一句都是 product lovers 會認同的:
•flexible
•malleable
•evolve
•we can create what we want
•improve products
•iterate
用了一連串正面的同義字,就是要塑造 change = positive 的氣氛。
★★★★★★★★★★★★
📌 連大改變,都用「改版」來形容
下一步,就是用一個大家理解的方式,來描述「非常大的改變」:
Recently, we've made some internal company changes, which, taken in total, collectively feel like a full version change. It deserves an announcement.
什麼是大的改變?就有點像「改版」的意思。而且注意到,他不是寫 "We're making a full version change" 喔,而是說:"changes... taken in total, collectively feel like a full version change."
也就是說,在中間加了很多緩衝的字眼,淡化 "full version change"。
就像你如果要跟一個人說他是混蛋,哪一種說法比較直接:
The way you act sometimes, when people don't know you yet, can feel like you're a bit of an asshole. 或是 You're an asshole.
講完這個,他就要給大家打預防針了。
而且又是從「產品」開始:
In the product world, not all changes are enjoyed by all customers. Some changes are immediately appreciated. Some changes take time to steep, settle in, and get acquainted with. And to some, some changes never feel quite right — they may even be deal breakers.
哇噻,好幾劑預防針啊!
而且他用了三個意思差不多的字,鼓勵大家「耐心的習慣新的改變」:Some changes take time to steep, settle in, and get acquainted with。
Again 他的用字很細心。"Get acquainted with" 就好像跟我們說,
改變其實是我們的朋友,只要我們願意好好認識它。
但他們其實知道,有些改變是一些人完全,完全無法接受的。
所以才有最後一句:"They may even be deal breakers"。
They totally knew what was coming...
★★★★★★★★★★★★
📌 溫和就到這裡... 語氣開始轉變
接下來,他選擇美國人非常愛用的寫法,就是引用一位大家尊敬的人的話,來幫自己助陣:
As Huxley offers in The Doors of Perception, "We live together, we act on, and react to, one another; but always and in all circumstances we are by ourselves. The martyrs go hand in hand into the arena; they are crucified alone. Embraced, the lovers desperately try to fuse their insulated ecstasies into a single self-transcendence; in vain. By its very nature every embodied spirit is doomed to suffer and enjoy in solitude."
這裡藏了點玄機。
如果他的目的是說服大家接受這些改變,那為什麼要引用這一段!?
讀起來,這段話反應了他的心情:在做困難決定時的「孤獨」。如果是這樣,那這段話的用途就是「療癒」而不是「說服」。
因為如果目的是說服,為何不引用某個你的員工/讀者都非常敬佩的人的故事,這個人做了一個不受歡迎,但大部分讀者都會認同是正確的決定?
個人猜測:他上面好話已經寫完了。真正的意涵是:We're going forward, alone if necessary。
而且,他們還把自己的決定,frame 成 navigating somewhere,同時把另一邊寫成 circling nowhere
We all want different somethings. Some slightly different, some substantially. Companies, however, must settle the collective difference, pick a point, and navigate towards somewhere, lest they get stuck circling nowhere.
★★★★★★★★★★★★
📌 語氣變的很硬:No More
然後他就開始寫改革本身。
如果把所有改變的第一句話看過去,會發現全部都是 "No more..." 開頭。這個硬到不行了。
完整文章: https://bit.ly/3wT6x3z
圖片出處: https://bit.ly/34wWkO5
★★★★★★★★★★★★
Presentality每天都在追蹤與分析跟英文溝通/寫作有關的文章,如果想要透過我們這些「閱讀筆記」一起學習,可在 FB 追蹤我們:https://www.facebook.com/presentality/
📌 Presentality系列文章:
1. 看貝佐斯致亞馬遜股東的最後一封信,學一些英文寫作小撇步
https://bit.ly/3xCN1cC
2. 英文演講實用的結構與技巧
https://bit.ly/2PHu3Ax
3. 在演講中的四種敘述角度
https://bit.ly/39tNUtv
4. 詩人Amanda Gorman的英文演講技巧
https://bit.ly/39sI3on
5. 從 Most Dangerous Place 文章,看經濟學人寫作邏輯
https://bit.ly/3htqJEs
6. 寫作的終極目標是「提供價值」
https://bit.ly/3yA3gYe
7. 看 Bloomberg學資深記者如何寫文章
https://bit.ly/3i3am1P
同時也有11部Youtube影片,追蹤數超過16萬的網紅崎山蒼志,也在其Youtube影片中提到,◎New Digital Single [嘘じゃない] ( English Title : "Believe" ) 【Listen&DL】https://soushi.lnk.to/3gDs3bWS 崎山蒼志 - [嘘じゃない ("Bilieve")] Music Video 7/31(土)18...
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fuse into 在 每天為你讀一首詩 Facebook 的最佳解答
十首台灣詩X十位愛爾蘭詩人朗讀
在學童當中 ◎#楊牧
O chestnut tree, great-rooted blossomer,
Are you the leaf, the blossom, or the bole?
O body swayed to music, O brightening glance,
How can we know the dancer from the dance?
--Yeats
一
樹影向東移動
那是時間的行逕
我們挪向七里香下
衣上沾滿秋天
脫落的草子。蓮花在
水池裡,白火雞
棲息枯木上,我們
在學童當中
一種焦慮的顏色
曾渲染過我行走
許多揣測的
道路,而你在
月光的深巷裡
寧靜地聽著
間奏的橫笛
梧桐樹和庭院
一畦又一畦的菊
有些疲倦,我們
隔著疲倦凝視:
不是陌生
也不熟悉
二
然而我們,我們
在學童當中——
不是陌生,也不
熟悉——今早遊戲的
圓圈比蓮花的
水池寬闊,歌聲
比噴泉生動,雖然
我不能盡知,不能盡知
那飛升的如何變化為
墜落的水點,雖然
那四散的形象
可能意識著一種
破碎而我也相信過破碎
如同那白髮的愛爾蘭人
在學童當中,我也
分辨。他們在拍手
長大成人,那掌聲破碎
可能遺失在今早的
草地上,他們也可能回來
尋覓。啊尋覓
也可能只是失望的
慰藉。噴泉回落池中
那歸來的水點破碎
乃匯入植養蓮花的世界——
幾時才能輪到它,你說
再度升起?
三
我彷彿看到你,真的
在學童當中
你在學童和我當中:
一棵光榮的果樹
我不能擁抱的
華麗;一名舞者
我不能追隨的
旋律。你沒有名字
我發覺,我也沒有
他們也沒有名字
他們可以是樹苗
是雙手舉向一章序曲
你是滿天似雪的
花朵,雙腳投向
一片超越的激楚,我是
苦澀的果實,收斂
萎縮,屏息,消滅
一場等候詮釋的舞
四
樹影向東移動
那是時間的行逕
你戀愛著,戀愛著
間奏的橫笛,我們
在學童當中
--
“Among School Children”
By Yang Mu (1940-2020)
Translated by Colin Bramwell and Wen-chi Li
Read by Michael O’Loughlin
O chestnut tree, great-rooted blossomer,
Are you the leaf, the blossom, or the bole?
O body swayed to music, O brightening glance,
How can we know the dancer from the dance?
--Yeats
1
Moving east, the shadow of a tree
becomes the trail of time
as we shift to the satinwood shade
autumn grass creeps across
our clothes. The lotus flowers
in the pond, a white turkey
perching on rotten wood
we are among school children
I used to deduce
a walking pavement dyed
with a fretful colour
now you are here
in the deep alleyway of moonlight
softly listening to the flute
reaching its interlude
there is a parasol tree, a garden
plot upon plot of chrysanthemums
dozing despite
our gaze
not strange
but not familiar
2
And we, we are
among school children—
not strange but not
familiar—the circles
in this game of morning
wider than the lotus pond
the singing voice more vivid than the spurt
though I do not quite understand
cannot quite understand how surging drops
can turn to falling rain
though anything scattered implies a sort of brokenness
and I did believe in brokenness once
I draw my distinctions
among school children
like that grey-haired Irishman. They grow
by clapping hands, their broken applause
could be lost in this meadow
of morning, where they may return
someday to search. And how
their searching may be nothing but
a disappointing comfort. Water sinks in the pond
the returning drops break too
flowing round the lotus cosmos
when is its turn, you ask me—
when will they surge?
3
Perhaps I really saw you
among school children
you among school children with me
a fruit tree so glorious
I cannot hold it—a dancer
to the melody that I have lost
I noticed you have no names
I have no name
they are nameless too
They can be saplings
or hands holding up a prelude
you are snowy flowers
in the sky, your feet dart and transcend
and fuse into that upper register
I am bitter fruit, drooping to converge
I do not breathe, I disappear:
a dance waiting to explain
4
Moving east, the shadow of a tree
becomes the trail of time
love, you are in love
the flute reaches its interlude
we are among school children
聽詩人Michael O’Loughlin朗讀:https://youtu.be/Qs-pdEANlAs
#每天為你讀一首詩 #楊牧 #Yang_Mu #在學童當中 #Among_School_Children #Michael_OLoughlin #台灣詩選 #Taiwanese_Poetry #駐愛爾蘭台北代表處 #愛爾蘭文學館 #Museum_of_Literature_Ireland
fuse into 在 Yilianboy Facebook 的精選貼文
你也喜歡你居住的地方嗎?
Do you also love the place you live in?
.
北投給我安心的歸屬感
工作的時候 她有城市的便利
休息的時候 她有鄉村的寧靜
遊玩的時候 她有景點的趣味
吃飯的時候 她有市場的熱情
.
她還有座我特別喜愛的大路口
大約六條馬路在此交會
掛著的號誌燈總是閃著
看似混亂的交通
隱藏著尊重 禮讓 謹慎
每每安全地通過這個路口後 我都會微微一笑
.
謝謝北投的朋友共同維護大路口的平安與和諧
我在想
真正成熟的人是否需要各種規矩法律限制行為?
不完整的法律需要另一條法律彌補
另一條法律又需要再一條法律補充
人人都是獨特的 只要有一群人就會有例外吧
.
I feel a great sense of belonging in Beitou
When I work, she is convenient like a city
When I rest, she is serene like countryside
When I play, she is interesting like a tourist attraction
When I eat, she has the passion of markets
.
She owns a big intersection that I love most
Six roads fuse here
The traffic lights are always flashing
The traffic seems like chaos
But what’s beneath is respect, comity, caution
Every time I pass the big intersection safe,
I gently smile on my face
.
I appreciate friends in Beitou for keeping the big intersection safe and harmony
What comes into my mind is,
Does a really mature person need to be restricted by regulations or laws?
An incomplete law needs another law to cover
And that law needs one more law to explain
Every single individual is unique,
Where there is people, there are exceptions
fuse into 在 崎山蒼志 Youtube 的最讚貼文
◎New Digital Single [嘘じゃない] ( English Title : "Believe" )
【Listen&DL】https://soushi.lnk.to/3gDs3bWS
崎山蒼志 - [嘘じゃない ("Bilieve")] Music Video
7/31(土)18:00 プレミア公開!
TVアニメ「僕のヒーローアカデミア」第5期(2クール目)エンディングテーマ
“"My Hero Academia” Season 5 Second Ending Theme Song
毎週土曜夕方5:30 読売テレビ・日本テレビ系全国29局ネット(※一部地域を除く)
#僕のヒーローアカデミア #週刊少年ジャンプ
http://heroaca.com
【嘘じゃない Special Site | "Believe" Special Site】
https://www.sonymusic.co.jp/Music/Info/sakiyamasoushi/usojyanai/
【嘘じゃない(Anime Size Lyric ver.)】
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=EZ-crtDkHJc
【『僕のヒーローアカデミア』TVアニメ5期第2クールノンクレジットエンディングムービー】
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=UNfXxvS8ZjA
****************
-Cast-
崎山蒼志
haru
-Staff-
Director: 大喜多正毅
Camera: 安田光
Camera Assistant: 高橋慶太
Light: 杉山泰則
Light Assistant: 鈴木裕介, 水足萌香
Hair&Make-up: 根本亜沙美
Stylist: 釘宮一彰 (崎山蒼志)
Textile Monster: NATSUKI HANYU (haru)
Casting: Oi-Chan
Production Manager: 池田飛鳥, 師田悠三
Driver: 鈴木令, 生田潤一郎, 古橋広美
Producer: 梅田知子
****************
9月22日(水) 「崎山蒼志「嘘じゃない」Release One-Man Live」
開場:東京・EX THEATER ROPPONGI
出演:崎山蒼志
時間:<開場>18:00 / <開演> 19:00
料金:前売り…4,500円 当日…5,000円(ドリンク代別)
その他チケットの先行予約ならびに一般発売情報は下記オフィシャルHPをチェック。
https://sakiyamasoushi.com/live/
<問い合わせ>
HOT STUFF PROMOTION 03-5720-9999
****************
◎Digital Single [逆行 | Gyakkou]
【Listen】https://soushi.lnk.to/rYhw3ZAY
【MV】https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=aFR7TjHtG7s
◎Major Debut Album [find fuse in youth]
【CD】 https://soushi.lnk.to/OSiXhsx4
【AL LISTEN】 https://soushi.lnk.to/find_fuse_in_youth_YC
【[Samidare] MV】 https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=8jjswrh3agE
【[Heaven] MV】 https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=_czo_mif1-4
【[Undulation] MV】 https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=qgS9eZM_ABM
【[そのままどこか] MV】 https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=axhqitECl1Y
【[花火] MV】 https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=fcOzyWb1gKE
・HP https://sakiyamasoushi.com/
・Twitter https://twitter.com/soushiclub
・Instagram https://www.instagram.com/soush.i_sakiyama/
・TikTok https://www.tiktok.com/@sakiyamasoushi_official?
****************
■嘘じゃない
Words & Music: 崎山蒼志
Arrange: Naoki Itai, モチヅキヤスノリ
Acoustic Guitar: 崎山蒼志
Piano: モチヅキヤスノリ
Bass: 北村雄太
Drums: 坂本暁良
Electric Guitar: サトウカツシロ
Strings: MIZ, 三國茉莉, 館泉礼一, 渡邉雅弦
Programming & All other Instruments: Naoki Itai
Recorded & Mixed by 村上宣之
Vocal Recorded by 渥美隆三
息をして触れてきた優しさが
いつの日か 蓄えた優しさになる
一人を越えて 君と繋がれたなら
瞬きの間に 二度とない千を見るよ
誰かが伝う 意味のない と
捨てられた 悲しみに
湛えられた炎を見ろよ
嘘じゃないよ
嘘じゃない
これからの未来は
何処へでも
繋がれる気がしてるの
悪夢の根源に
居た君を いつか必ず
救い出すから
救い出せるから
擦りきれた心と闇の中へ
今綻んだ関係を辿る途中で
枯れ果てたと感じてた記憶も
枯れちゃいない
そう微かに気づいたのさ
空がほら 広がってく
余計なものも 愛しく
泣けるほどに 痛ましいさ
笑顔を突き立てよう
これからの未来は
何処にでも
繋がれる気がしてるの
悪夢の根源に
居た君を いつか必ず
救い出すから
揺らぎあるものの為に
生きてきたんじゃないし
でもこの振動は
私を確かに 呼んでる
嘘じゃない
嘘じゃない
歪みある世界に立っている
心崩れ落ちる音
溢さぬよう 何度も作ったダムも忘れはしないよ
これからの未来は
何処へでも
繋がれる気がしてるの
悪夢の根源に
居た君を いつか必ず
救い出すから
救い出せるから
■"Believe" - Lyric
The pieces of warmth I've breathed and touched
will someday be amassed
If my path goes beyond alone and leads to you
I will see the vast scenery of a lifetime while I blink
Someone says it has no meaning
and throws away the sorrow
Look at the fire within it
Take my word
Take my word
The future from now
I feel that
my path can link to anywhere
The root of nightmare
where you have been, I promise that someday
I will get you out of there
I can get you out of there
Into the rusty mind and darkness
I trace back the frayed ties now, and
the memories I thought I have exhausted
are still there
I subtly knew
Look, the sky is stretching out
Even the frills seem so dear
and wrenching to make me cry
I will thrust a smile
The future from now
I feel that
it can lead to anywhere
The root of nightmare
where you have been, I promise that someday
I will get you out of there
The flickering things
are not what I have lived for
But this vibration
is indeed calling me
Take my word
Take my word
Standing on a distorted world
I hear the heart falling apart
I've made dams many times to keep it together
The future from now
I feel that
it can lead to anywhere
The root of nightmare
where you have been, I promise that someday
I will get you out of there
I can get you out of there
#崎山蒼志 #嘘じゃない #Usojanai #Believe #ヒロアカ #heroaca_a
fuse into 在 Square Enix Youtube 的精選貼文
SaGa Frontier Remastered is out 15th April 2021, on Steam®, Nintendo Switch™, Playstation®4, iOS and Android!
Experience this role-playing adventure as one of eight heroes, each with their own storyline and goals, including exciting new protagonist FUSE. This remaster also features previously omitted scenarios and cutscenes, so you can delve deeper into the story than ever before!
Enjoy thrilling battles, and unfold your own unique story with the Free Scenario system.
https://square-enix-games.com/en_US/games/saga-frontier-remastered
fuse into 在 Square Enix Youtube 的最佳貼文
With optimized new features and graphics, an exciting new protagonist and never-before-seen content, the classic RPG title is coming to Steam®, Nintendo Switch™, Playstation®4, iOS and Android!
Experience this role-playing adventure as one of eight heroes, each with their own storyline and goals, including exciting new protagonist FUSE. This remaster also features previously omitted scenarios and cutscenes, so you can delve deeper into the story than ever before!
Enjoy thrilling battles, and unfold your own unique story with the Free Scenario system.
SaGa Frontier Remastered is available on the 15th April 2021.
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fuse into 在 s3fs-fuse/s3fs-fuse: FUSE-based file system backed ... - GitHub 的推薦與評價
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